There are a lot of things in life that are difficult to accept when you are young....
1) That you are not uber smart and have many awesome original thoughts every day and if only someone would recognise you for your brilliance and pay you simply to share the amazing ideas you have.
- I'm pretty sure that I did have amazing ideas at one stage. I look back at my university essays and wonder who that person was, and holy fuck did I own a theasaurus back then? dang girl you was erudite. I can't remember the last original thought I had.
2) You are not going to live forever, in fact you are going to die very very soon. Life is extremely extremely short.
- oh cruel world. you sucked up the last ten years of my life. I can barely remember any of it! Futher proof I am living in a simulation. Everything is rushing by so quickly, I need more time!
3) That every person you meet will most certainly not care about your uniques transcendent pain about whatever life crisis you are having.
- Essentialy we are not unique flowers. We are mere motes. But knowing this can help you to be happy.
There are a few things that I find hard to accept now that I am not so young.
1) TV fooled me (and certain friends I had) into thinking that it was natural to have close relationships with your siblings. I don't think either of my brothers even know where I live. They live nomadic lives and I have no idea about either of them. I love them both, and I really enjoy them but I'll be lucky to have one conversation with them when they are in the country.
Things feel apart as we grew up, I was jealous of their sporting achievements and social successes. They lived in a completely different world than me. During our teenage years we barely related. I bailed and left as soon as I had an offer of a way out.
How do you bridge that gap as adults? We have little in common (Apart from a fondness for the drink).
I am so proud of them both. They are awesome young men, I hope they at least know that and that I think of them often.
2) I always thought adults had all the power. Truth is they are often locked into their lifestyle as much as a child is fated to theirs. It takes extreme courage and tenacity to break free. I did not know this as a child. I thought everyone chose where they ended up in life. Its just not that simple.
3) I still find it hard to accept that no one really cares about strangers or acquaintances, but its true. If I turn up to work in a shitty mood because my life is falling apart and my shoulder hurts and I can't bare another day on the space out medication no one cares. They see a grumpy shitty co-worker all they care about is how my grumpiness affects them.
Lets face it, I'm the same. Its difficult to transcend that immediate reaction to someone's mood, as humans we always make it about ourselves too e.g. "Gawd that person is being so shitty, what did I ever do to them, they are make me feel awful for no reason, I wish they'd just cheer the fuck up"
Its a bit contradictory but if we could get to a place where other peoples moods and behaviour didn't affect us or hurt us so easily we could actually become more caring human beings. If we don''t let anyone dictate to us what our moods or feelings should be we can become islands of happiness much more capable of caring and seeing others true pain.
